"Self-Condemnation"

Have you ever noticed some days you are all on it and other days you don't seem to know what you are doing. "You've probably noticed that your confidence ebbs and flows." It varies greatly from day to day: One day you're up, and one day you're down. What causes that? In part, it's what is going on inside of you. When we face life's hurts, habits, and hang-ups, it's important that we walk out of self-condemnation and into forgiveness.

What causes self-condemnation?

Unresolved guilt: This reminds me of a sign I saw the other day: "A clean engine produces more power." That's true in humans, too. Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, the man who wrote "Sherlock Holmes," once pulled on a prank on 12 prominent Englishmen. He sent them an anonymous note that said, "All is found out. Flee at once." Within 24 hours, eight of those men had left the country! Guilt destroys your confidence.

Unrealistic expectations: This is also known as perfectionism--the feeling that I must be flawless, that I must please everybody, that I always have to do more, that I'm not allowed to relax.

If you're a perfectionist, your favorite phrase is "I should...I must...I ought...I have to..." You're always doing more.

If you're an average person, you have three things on your daily "to do" list. You get one of them done, you leave one of them unfinished, and the third one you just forget about. You go home and put your feet up at night and feel good about one yourself.

If you're a perfectionist, you have 29 things on your daily "to do" list. You finish 28 of them, then you go home and feel like a failure! Both guilt and perfectionism cause a lack of confidence in our lives. -Rick Warren